Lost And Found (2005)
1. Determined
Go...
So fucking determined
Yeah, yeah go...
You better believe it, confidence
Go...
So fucking determined
Yeah, yeah go...
Spit out all reason,
Yeah
I'm tired of holdin' up the weight,
The weight of the motherfuckin' world.
All I want is just to get right here
Right now.
We struggle and fight just to get in a grave
That's overflowing
Clock's ticking on my fifteen minutes of fame
Come on now, one two three go
So fucking determined
Yeah, yeah go...
You better believe it, confidence
Go...
So fucking determined
Yeah, yeah go...
Spit out all reason,
Yeah
I'm flushing the trust of everyone
Stabbing in the back and thinkin' they can break me
Set my sight can't die 'till I'm done, mind endurance
Never wanted anymore than what I deserve
Better bring it I'm taking it all
Fuck an inch 'cause I'm bringin' a mile
It's on now one two three go
So fucking determined
Yeah, yeah go...
You better believe it, confidence
Go...
So fucking determined
Yeah, yeah go...
Spit out all reason,
Yeah
This fire,
Is growing,
Is burning
Deep inside of me.
Focused,
Driven,
Certain,
The way it's got to be.
Fire.
Growing.
Burning.
Deep inside of me,
Focused,
Driven,
Certain,
The way it's got to be.
Crooked.
No trust.
Liars.
Conmen.
Drunk with
Power.
Mentor.
Taught me everything that I know...
So wrong,
Wrong,
Wrong,
Wrong...
One two three GO...
So fucking determined
Yeah, yeah go...
You better believe it, confidence
Go...
So fucking determined
Yeah, yeah go...
Spit out all reason,
Yeah
Go...
I'm fucking determined
Yeah, yeah go...
You better believe it, confidence
Go...
I'm fucking determined
Yeah, yeah go...
Spit out all reason,
Yeah
2. Pushing Through
Rip the womb
Feeling so sorry
Selfish and sore
WISH I WASN'T BORN
Piece by piece I can carry it all
Strength to be driven
So unforgiving anything is possible
Like leaving you all
I'm turning my back on this killing so small
Step by step I'm pushing through this
(All of you get away from me)
Eye for an eye I'm pushing through this
My law
Step by step I'm pushing through this
(All of you get away from me)
Tooth for a tooth I'm pushing through this
Through you
Salt the wound
Cut through a conscience I've failed to explore
The calm before the storm
Speak your peace and prepare for the fall
Words have been chosen
Tainting the gift
Lying truth's so incredible
So fuck you all
I'm turning my back on this killing so small
Step by step I'm pushing through this
(All of you get away from me)
Eye for an eye I'm pushing through this
My law
Step by step I'm pushing through this
(All of you get away from me)
Tooth for a tooth I'm pushing through this
Through you
Spread the word
The killing is over
Spread the word
The killing is over
Severed, more than I am, more than I ever was,
Blindside, threatened, my worth, sequestered
Deliverance
You stoned a part of me
You've taken a part of me
Try
You wanted to be
Wanted to have a life
You wanted to fight
Wanted the right...Your lies
Spoken to me without a conscious
No right
Why
Breaking a mold
Breaking the trust
A child
Innocent lost
Ultimate cost
The loss
Life so undone
Deserted the seed
You've buried the bottle
Step by step I'm pushing through this
(All of you get away from me)
Eye for an eye I'm pushing through this
My law
Step by step I'm pushing through this
(All of you get away from me)
Tooth for a tooth I'm pushing through this
Through you
Step by step I'm pushing through
Eye for an eye I'm pushing through
Tooth for a tooth I'm pushing through
Pushing through
Pushing through
Pushing through
Pushing through
Pushing
Pushing
Pushing
Pushing through
3. Happy?
In this hole
That is me
The dead are rolling over
In this hole
Thickening
Dirt shoveled over shoulders
I feel it in me
So overwhelmed
Oh this pressured center rising
My life over turned
Unfair the despair
All these scars keep ripping open
Peel me from the skin
Tear me from the rind
Does it make you happy now?
Tear meat from the bone
Tear me from myself
Are you feeling happy now?
In this hole
That is me
A life that's growing feeble
In this hole
So limiting
The sun has set all darkness
Buried underneath
Hands slip off the wheel
Internal pathway to contention
Peel me from the skin
Tear me from the rind
Does it make you happy now?
Tear meat from the bone
Tear me from myself
Are you feeling happy now?
Are you
HAPPY
Are you
HAPPY
Are you feeling happy?
In this hole
That is me
Left with a heart exhausted
Whats my release?
What sets me free?
Do you pull me up just to push me down again?
Peel me from the skin
Tear me from the rind
Does it make you happy now?
Tear meat from the bone
Tear me from myself
Are you feeling happy?
Peel me from the skin
(peel me from the skin)
Tear me from the rind
Does it make you happy now?
Tear meat from the bone
(Tear meat from the bone)
Tear me from myself
Are you feeling happy?
Does it make you happy?
Are you feeling happy?
Are you fucking happy?
Now that I'm lost left with nothing
Does it make you happy?
Are you feeling happy?
Are you fucking happy?
Now that I'm lost left with nothing?
4. IMN
Suicide
Don't give a fuck about this
My life or any other
Just go away and let me hang
Impossible to forgive, forget it, murderer
I'm in control
Living a lie
Make you pay at all cost for this
Love sick
Bullshit
Bring it
Decisions making themselves
I don't need you
Thorns in my side
So I die
No one
No one could ever understand
My life's exhausted
No one
No one could ever understand
This life IMN
Determined
To bring you all down with me
Break you
Beat down
No more fucking empathy
From me, for you
Fed up i've had enough
Duality
My war
Existence
Instigated controversy
Lay down
Sell out
So wrong
Drag the blade and go away
I stand, cold cruel and lost
Take me I'm ready
No one
No one could ever understand
My life's exhausted
No one
No one could ever understand
Pressure constricting
So hard
Like a stone
Fight hard
Break bones break
No one
No one could ever understand
This life IMN
Your pressure
My time
Eroding
My life
Fight for your honesty
Fight for integrity
All work and no play
All work and no play
All work and no play waiting
All work and no play
All work and no play left me
Sick!
I want to eat a bullet
Carve myself
Beat my face
Catotonic
Dig my brain
No pain! suffocate!
Stomach aches
Don't give a fuck
I'm out, I'm done
Fuck this shit
You've dug the hole
I'm lying in
No one could ever understand
No one could ever understand
Fight for your honesty
Fight for integrity
No one
No one could ever understand
My life's exhausted
No one
No one could ever understand
Pressure constricting
So hard
Like a stone
Fight hard
Break bones break
No one
No one could ever understand
This life, IMN
My world
My rules
My noose
My world
My rules
Fuck you
My world
My rules
My noose
My world
My rules
Fuck you
5. Fall Into Sleep
Dreams of earthquakes
Dreams of hurricanes
Dreams of pouring rain
Dreams of tidal waves...to wash us all away
Dreams of guns blazed
Dreams of fire rage
Dreams of swollen graves
Dreams of hollow pain
All gone
No more fallen
No more enemy
No more casuality
No more dream
Fall into sleep
Fall into me
I have a dream
But nobody cares
Nobody wants to listen
Fall into sleep
Fall into me
Hang on to a dream that nobody wants
Nobody cares anymore
Dreams of mourning grief
Dreams of disbelief
Dreams of tragedy
Dreams of our disease...to take us all away
Dreams of fidelity
Dreams of inner peace
Dreams of loyalty
Dreams of unity
All gone
All gone
Fall into sleep
Fall into me
I have a dream
But nobody cares
Nobody wants to listen
Fall into sleep
Fall into me
Hang on to a dream that nobody wants
Nobody cares anymore
The angels are injured
Fall with broken burning wings
Are we dead inside
Are we blind
We can't keep moving forward
Backwards with closed eyes
We're losing sight
All lost inside
No more fallen
No more enemy
Fall into sleep
Fall into me
I have a dream
But nobody cares
Nobody wants to listen
Fall into sleep
Fall into me
Hang on to a dream that nobody wants
Nobody cares
Nobody wants
Nobody cares anymore
All gone
All gone
All gone
All gone
6. Rain. Sun. Gone.
So far
Left with nothing
Hanging by a memory
No stars
To give me one wish
So lost in the dark
Feels like I'm caving in from the outside
All right
All wrong
See you again
So long
Nothing matters anymore at all
Nothing matters anymore
Life's not meant to be disposable
Lost. Found. Dead.
Ready and willing
Can't stop the bleeding
Life's not meant to be expendable
Rain. Sun. Gone.
Left robbed unwilling
Can't fight the feeling
So low
Overwhelming
Clinging to a tragedy
So clear
Hear weeping voices
Tears fall in the dark
Feels like I'm carving in from the outside
So lost. So gone. So wrong.
Life's not meant to be disposable
Lost. Found. Dead.
Ready and willing
Can't stop the bleeding
Life's not meant to be expendable
Rain. Sun. Gone.
Left robbed unwilling
Can't fight the feeling
It's never ending
Never goes away
But you did
It's never ending
Never goes away
But you did...
Why
The body's just a vehicle to hold
Until we find another space
Find another place
To start this over
The enemy
The action I can't condone
Do you suffer with me
Can I give you my loss
To feel
To hold close
Can I give you my pain
To feel
To be eaten alive by
Conscience
Suffer
Fucking suffer
Suffer like me
Life's not meant to be disposable
Lost. Found. Dead.
Ready and willing
Can't stop the bleeding
Life's not meant to be expendable
Rain. Sun. Gone.
Left robbed unwilling
Can't fight the feeling
7. Choices
Leaders are guilty of nothing
They're perfectly insane
But if they'd point the finger at themselves
Who would be left to blame
Lead into grace
Lead to corruption
Ini-Mini-Miny-Mo
A truth or lie has to be spoken
Ini-Mini-Miny-Mo
King or con has to be chosen
Ini-Mini-Miny-Mo
Way of life complete or broken...broken
Choices
No more...choices
No more...choices
No more...choices
Leaders are guilty of nothing
They're perfectly insane
But if they'd point the finger at themselves
Who would be left to blame
Follow truth or stutter through a lie
Ini-Mini-Miny-Mo
Will to push or give up and fall behind
Ini-Mini-Miny-Mo
Live with peace or nurture your tragic life
Ini-Mini-Miny-Mo
Bite the bullet or swallow it whole
Leaders are guilty of nothing
They're perfectly insane
But if they'd point the finger at themselves
Who would be left to blame
Point the finger at yourself
There's no choice
Anymore anyway...
We don't have a choice
Anymore anyway
We don't have a voice
Anymore Anyway
There's no choice in freedom
There's no voice in freedom
We don't have a choice
Anymore anyway
We don't have a voice
Anymore anyway
There's no choice in freedom
There's no voice in freedom
Leaders are guilty of nothing
They're perfectly insane
But if they'd point the finger at themselves
Who would be left to blame
They're lost system of destruction
Flush all hope down the drain
But if they'd point the finger at themselves
Who is left to blame
Who is left to blame
We don't have a choice
Anymore anyway
We don't have a voice
Anymore anyway
There's no choice in freedom
There's no voice in freedom
We don't have a choice
Anymore anyway
We don't have a voice
Anymore anyway
There's no choice in freedom
There's no voice in freedom
We don't have a choice
Anymore anyway
We don't have a voice
Anymore anyway
We don't have a reason
Anymore anyway
We don't have control
Anymore anyway
We don't have opinions
Anymore anyway
There's no choice in freedom
There's no voice in freedom
Freedom, buy in
Freedom, sell out
Freedom, betray
Freedom, lay down
Freedom, corrupt
Freedom, opinion
Freedom, give up
Freedom, give in
8. Forget To Remember
What have I done?
Where have I come from?
When I burnt the backs with the sun through a glass
did I seal the loss that's become me?
Feeling undone
What have I become?
When I turned my back on you I turned my back on
myself and became this machine
Thoughtlessness
Selfishness
Hopelessness
Arrogant
I feel it on the inside
Twisting and contorting
Memory has shaped me once again
Still feel you on the inside
Biting through and stinging
Will I ever forget to remember?
Shadows in the sun
Filter through us
Still wrestle the demons that arrested me as a child
Confession rejected
We grow up
To give up
People step on the cracks for wounds owed paid back
Through the words of surrender
Emptiness
Loneliness
Listlessness
Worthless
I feel it on the inside
Twisting and contorting
Memory has shaped me once again
Still feel you on the inside
Biting through and stinging
Will I ever forget to remember?
Can you save me?
From myself
From these memories
Can you save me?
From myself
From these memories
Surrender
To the shadows
Haunting inside
Bleed through you
Surrender to the secretes...inside
Lies within you
I feel it on the inside
Twisting and contorting
Memory has shaped me once again
Still feel you on the inside
Biting through and stinging
Will I ever forget to remember?
Can't feel you on the inside
Set down the bag and left it
Lost memory has left me
One again
Open up the inside
Admission for the cleansing
Now that I've forgotten to remember
Surrender
To the shadows
Haunting inside
Bleed through you
9. TV Radio
You incomplete me
You tune me into
Whitewash
Spoon fed
Brain dead
Sloth
I'd watch the paint dry before giving in
Black out
Stupor
Inferior
Insignifigant
False stars above keep us sedated
Satellite
Astronaut
Spaceship
The Government
I'm overdosing on reality
Don't stop the feed
No don't touch the feed
I don't wanna wanna be
Wanna wanna be
I don't want to be here
Wanna wanna be here so let's go
Turn off the radio
Turn off the TV
I don't wanna be
Wanna wanna be
I don't want to be here so let's go
Turn off the radio
Turn off the TV
Eliminate me you turn me into
Lifeless
Cliche'
Thoughtless
Unbelievable
So bored with my life
Entertained me with normal
Usual
Average
It's so typical
Artists traded in for the talentless
Spoiled kid
Wife swap
Tycoon
The has-beens
So entertaining it makes me sick
Don't stop the feed
Don't
No don't touch the feed
I don't wanna wanna be
Wanna wanna be
I don't want to be here
Wanna wanna be here so let's go
Turn off the radio
Turn off the TV
I don't wanna wanna be
Wanna wanna be
I don't want to be here
Wanna wanna be here so let's go
Turn off the radio
Turn off the TV
I'm so uninterested
So unamused
Dissapointed in yourself
To be so consumed
I'm so uninterested
So unamused
Dissapointed in yourself
To be so consumed
Buy nothing
Nothing
Buy nothing
Nothing
I don't wanna wanna be
Wanna wanna be
I don't want to be here
Wanna wanna be here so let's go
Turn off the radio
Turn off the TV
I don't wanna wanna be
Wanna wanna be
I don't want to be here
Wanna wanna be here so let's go
Turn off the radio
Turn off the TV
I don't wanna wanna be
Wanna wanna be
I don't want to be here
Wanna wanna be here so let's go
Turn off the radio
Turn off the TV
I don't wanna wanna be
Wanna wanna be
I don't want to be here
Wanna wanna be here so let's go
Turn off the radio
Turn off the TV
10. Just
Just a few seconds away from everyone
From everything
Just a few seconds away
A second of your time and an inch of my own space
Silence
Quiet
Need a little peace of mind
After all this
After all that you do
Shut it up
Zip it
I need a little time to think
Without all this
Without all that you do
Keep it
Don't want it
Think I'll just go away
Away from here
From you
Time out
Walk it off
Think I need to throw a flag
Just a little break from the games that you play
Just a few seconds away from everyone
From everything
Just a few seconds away
All I want from all of you
Just a few seconds away
Away from this
It's neverending
Just a few seconds away
A second of your time and an inch of my own space
Beat it up
Whip it out
Top it with a little scream
All that you are
For all that you do
Crush it all
Kill it
Calling out my enemy
Don't want anything
I want nothing from you
Dry it up
Baby
Turn around and walk away
Cry your tears
Pussy
Lift it up
Destroy it
Build it up to tear it down
All the little things that make me run away
Just a few seconds away from everyone
From everything
Just a few seconds away
All I want from all of you
Just a few seconds away
Away from this
It's neverending
Just a few seconds away
Just a second of your time and an inch of my own space
Stop talking
Stop bothering me
Just walk away
I've had enough today
I have a life too
I've had enough of you
Feel like screaming
So go the fuck away
Go away
Go away
Go away
Go away
Just a few seconds away from everyone
From everything
Just a few seconds away
All I want from all of you
Just a few seconds away
Away from this
It's neverending
Just a few seconds away
A second of your time and an inch of my own space
11. All That You Are
Repeating in my head
Betrayal
Repeating in my head
Insecurities
Repeating in my head
Dividends
It's not your fault
The well of thought and trust has run dry
Don't be afraid to let go
Don't be afraid to start over when it's over
Let go
Let go
Let go
Let go
Let go of feelings
Let go of compromise
Hollow trunk for shelter
So dark and cold inside
I always seem to find myself alone
Jaded shell of being
Porous as a stone
Calloused
Rigid
Empty
Because of you
Let go of trusting
Lost thought for family
Let go of living
No more concerns of demise
I never seem to find rhythm for life's harmony
Contorted
Twisted broken
Without a reason
Calloused
Rigid
Empty
Because of you
It's all me
All you are
Without me
There's nothing else
There's no one
Brainwash
All you are
Without me
You're by yourself
There's no one
Hope is out of season
Lost sight
No hint of light
Get busy living or get busy dying
Calloused
Rigid
Empty
Because of you
It's all me
All you are
Without me
There's nothing else
There's no one
Brainwash
All you are
Without me
You're by yourself
There's no one
Save me
This loss
Closure my
Answer
So grant it
You owe me all that you are
Without me
You're nothing
You're no one
Terrified
Petrified
Nothing
You're no one
Do you care because I don't
Nothing
You're no one
Nobody cares so just go
Nothing
You're no one
By yourself all alone
It's all me
All you are
Without me
You're by yourself
There's no one
Brainwash
All you are
Without me
You're by yourself
There's no one
Save me
This loss
Closure my
Answer
So grant it
You owe me all that you are
Without me
You're nothing
12. Pulling The String
Running I'm alway running from myself
No one to help me
No one knows
Not that anyone who knew would care
Dangling
Hanging from your tree
Am I an ornament of longing
A seed trapped inside the shell that is me
Nobody can save me
From this
From myself
Hurricane of head space
Spinning circle
Stacking up the walls that hide you from yourself
Crumbling pieces of me
An offering to you
Falling gifts from me to you
Left nothing for myself
You had my cake and ate it too
And left nothing for me
Fist
For breaking
These eyes
For seeing
Right through
Heart
For you to trample
Confidence lost
Nothing to lose
Nothing to gain
From this loss
This right of passage denied
Holding the headstone
Tied to no one
Loosen the knot
Pulling the string
Losing
Feels like I'm losing all my worth
No one to notice
No one would care
If they took the time to stop and stare
Nobody has the time for me
For myself
Blistering pieces of me
I'm giving them to you
These sweet whispers are from me to you
Want nothing for myself
You hold my world inside your hands
And leave nothing for me
Fist
For breaking
These eyes
For seeing
Right through
Heart
For you to trample
Confidence lost
Nothing to lose
Nothing to gain
From this loss
This right of passage denied
Holding the headstone
Tied to no one
Loosen the knot
Pulling the string
So sorry
For whatever it was I've done
So I'm deserting
Sincerely
Me
Got to just be
You've got to just know
I've got to leave
It's time for me to go
So here's the note
I've left the key
I hope that when you find this
I've left you with a happy ending...
Goodbye
Goodbye
Goodbye
Fist
For breaking
These eyes
For seeing
Right through
Heart
For you to trample
Confidence lost
Nothing to lose
Nothing to gain
